Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
