There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
