operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
