An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
It's rum buckets o'clock
Two words: blizzard sex
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
