I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
How does one acquire holy water?
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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