At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Randomize
