2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
I don't think brook has ever known best
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
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