almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
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