u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
