i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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