I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Randomize
