I love black thongs
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
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I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
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