Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
