Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
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