Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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