Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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