now i know why i became what i already was.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
