The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Randomize
