My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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