well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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