i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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