Your face is a jimmy john
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
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