I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Randomize