I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
