You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
