The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
