billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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