at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
