just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
