I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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