i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
