great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
i believe in u and ur pee
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize