Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Randomize
