Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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