I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
You can't special order awesome
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
