I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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