if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
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