SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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