Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
