YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
