I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize