left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
