Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
