Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
