So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
