I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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