That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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