I accidentally had phone sex last night
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
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