honey bunches of taint.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
