Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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